God and me!

Most of you know that I'm not much a religious person. In fact, the only time I really ever say prayers is during dinner on Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. Tracie wants me to go to church but I tell her that God doesn't need me to go to a building and hang out with hundreds of strangers for him to know that I believe in him.
I remember when I was twelve, I lost my big sister to a car accident, she was 17. I would imagine I said hundreds of prayers during the month that my sis was holding on to her life. After she passed on, I had my doubts about the man upstairs. I had so many emotions running through my head (so many that I think I ran out of them) that I didn't know what to think. I told myself there was no such thing as God, how could he take someone who had so much going for her?

Well, after sometime passed my brother and sister in law had a baby (Lexus). Come to find out she was conceived right around the same time that my sis had passed. This is where it gets interesting; I used to think that Lexus was filled with my sister's spirit. Of course years later, I realize that Lex got the artistic side of her spirit and her hard headed nature. My daughter Kate was born on the same day that Stacy passed some 19 years later (kate was 2 weeks early).

Anyway, after Lexus was born, I came to terms with God. My sister was a good person in the world and judging by the thousands of people that came to her memorial service I would say that she made an impact on a lot of people. I realized that if she would have come to, her way of life would not be too good. She loved volleyball and loved to dance. She had severe head trauma which means that she would more than likely be in a wheel chair and with no way to communicate. God and me had a chat: He needed a leader and a saint to help upstairs as well as a front blocker on his cloud volleyball team. I figure when it's your time and God needs your assistance, it's time to check out. I'm cool with that now.

Truth be told, my sister has always been by my side. When I used to step to the plate at TCU, I would dig in, clean the landing point, step out and draw a "S" in the dirt next to the box and always say, "alright Stace, what do you have planned for me this time?"
Sometimes she'd help me and sometimes not! You can't be victorious all the time.

Well, this is where the God things comes into hand again. Yesterday my brother called me and the first thing out of his mouth is, "I've got some bad news." If wasn't sitting down already, I would have fallen because my knees buckled. I said those three little words, "Oh My God." I prepared for the worst and Jake said, "mom's been kicked by a horse!" I said those three words again, mainly because I was speechless and couldn't think of anything else at the time. For one second, my world got turned upside down. Jake's next sentence was, "she has three broken ribs and a possible broken arm." Oh thank God!

Now, I'm not sure what you would call what happened but to me, I said a prayer and he came through. It wasn't her time to go. Apparently, there are plenty of horse trainer, jewelry makers and marketing people up there so she gets to hang around for a while longer.

Not sure where I was going with this story. Perhaps I just needed to get it out. I don't talk about my sister much and I haven't showed emotion in more than 20 years. As I write this, I'm sure my eyes are swelled up and I can tell I still have some emotion within. I probably still won't go to church but I'll say prayers more often. Not just for my family but for those that are less fortunate than myself or those who may be going through rough times. Perhaps that is what we all need to do. Give some thanks and be grateful for the people we have around us!

Again, thank you God for keeping my mom on this Earth!